Where is your Delight?

This past week I led a silent hike at Landis Arboretum. It was the very first one I’ve ever done.

I am inclined toward self study. I’ve been working to dig out from under outmoded conditioned behaviors since I had my first child and realized I wouldn’t want for him the life I was choosing for myself. To me, he deserved better. It took me a long time to include myself in that equation.

I know I am capable of holding space for others. I’ve got my limitations in ego spikes and defensive measures, but I’ve taken a lot of time to hone being a nurturing person. Leading the hike was a slightly different experience relative to teaching a yoga class or sharing with a friend. I felt good about leading without speaking.

Facing yourself with honesty and non-judgement is hard. I remember when I learned I was lying to myself. I find that a fascinating psychological possibility. You’re in all of you. Where can anything hide? As I’ve thought (and probably said) a million times, perspective is everything. From where you are looking changes how you see.

On my way home I slowly shifted. From being able to see and feel the connection of all things, from impartial, unbiased observation and allowing to this and that identification, to good and bad labels. To judgement.

I am regularly delighted. There are many factors that contributes to this. Regardless of how, it is.

I am delighted by the sound of frogs,

the hum of a hive,

the panic of a squirrel,

the seemingly aimless float of a butterfly.

I am transfixed by light through leaves.

I love the way bark looks. I can feel the twist of it in my own trunk.

I left the arboretum with the feeling that anything is possible and within my reach. I felt relieved of uncertainty. Then, I drove back to “civilization”. Back where everyone wants to be noticed but not scrutinized.

How do you impose your insides on the outside world?

What do you take in from what others impose from their insides?